Bambi & Boren

OK, I’ll admit it. I have never been animal hunting with a gun in my entire life, much less felt inclined to join the National Rifle Association (NRA).

In Thursday’s edition (May 15) of the Tulsa World, there’s a story about Oklahoma’s privileged son, US Representative Dan Boren, being appointed to the Board of Directors of the NRA. That puts him right in the pantheon of advocates of “campus-carry” laws and unrestricted firearms sales.

Boren is quoted, “I harvested my first buck at age 9 and have taken one every season since.” What kind of English is this? Where did he go to school?

By using the word ”harvested,” was he saying he ran over a deer with a wheat combine? Probably not.

Boren goes on to say that he’s “taken” one every season since. Come on, Danny Boy, I’ve “taken” my granddaughters to the park and to school. To take means to carry or transport something. The only way to “take” a deer is to kill it first.

So, why is Boren afraid of saying he “uses a gun to kill deer.” Maybe he doesn’t want to offend the sandal wearing, latte sipping, tofu eating, PETA crowd!

Their granddaughters might call him a “Bambi Murderer.”

"I am not anti-gun. I'm pro-knife. Consider the merits of a knife. In the first place, you have to catch up with someone in order to stab him. A general substitution of knives for guns would promote physical fitness. We'd turn into a nation fo great runners. Plus, knives don't ricochet. And people are seldom killed while cleaning their knives." -- Molly Ivins.